On being more truthful

Damn it, I miss you. Or,
to be more truthful - I miss the idea
of you.

You have, after all, existed mostly in my head.
You were words made flesh.
But, Jesus Christ, how real it seemed.

If I long for the dream I have
of you,
Is it any less than if I did long for you?
It can't be all that different. After all,
the dream wouldn't be the same dream without you.

On being more truthful, I will tell you a secret. (I cannot be completely honest, but that is alright, everyone understands that.) Do you remember when once you told me that you missed me? I did not want to say "thank you" so I let it slide. Instead, I set off on a non-sequitur because that was the path of least resistance. Also, that was the only way I could be honest.

Do you remember when once I told you that I wanted a hug? That part was true. I told you that because, because of you there is a tautology I don't ever forget and it helps me to be more careful with my words.

I want what I want
when it isn't what I need. Or,
to be more truthful - I can't need you.

Rand says that love must be selfish
and even if I, sometimes, despise objectivism
I agree with her.

I hope that you too are selfish.
It would be great, it would be grand.
We would weave wonderful dreams.

Dman it, I miss you.
I hope this does not make you happy.
It is not meant to.


  1. honesty indeed, is such a lonely word.

  2. Hi Drew. Tautology to the max ito.

  3. Alterjon, and it's hardly ever heard. :(

    Hi Peter, isn't tautology such a nice word?

  4. I hate that bitch Ayn Rand. Wala lang maka-hate lang hahahaha

  5. lol @ glentot's hatred.

    i don't think love is ever selfish although these days, it seems everything is. wala lang, maka-confuse lang. lol

  6. Grabe Glen, nararamdaman ko ang anger mo all the way here. Haha

    Nyl, confused virgin na pala ang drama ngayon? :P

  7. I never said I was a virgin. Parang ang laki namang kasinungalingan naman nun. bwahaha

    Virgin, no. Virginal, hell yeah!

  8. Honesty kung honesty. Kudos Nyl - you are very brave! :)

  9. love shouldn't be selfish. ayan na, may pinaghuhugutan ang lola mo.

  10. Drew,

    How truthful is truthful?

    Is half a truth better than nothing at all? I may be wrong but somehow I think even here, when you try to be more truthful, there are still things you are afraid to say.

    But then again, this is on being more truthful, not on being more courageous.


  11. Truth is a double-edged sword one has to be pretty cautious when using.

  12. I'll do away with the pseudo-philosophical whatnot and say that this [post] shows why you're so much better than the other regularities. :)

    Maybe now you can tell me who You is? :P

  13. Kane, you are exactly right. The way I see it, half a truth is a glass half full. :)

    Guyrony, silahis pala ang katotohanan!

    Marky, thank you for always being so kind.

  14. How disarming is the truth?

    Do you remember when once I told you that I wanted a hug? That part was true.

    How we let our guard down by our transparency.